If you haven’t read part one first please do.
I almost died for the second time when Brianna came into the kitchen early that morning. I was on my hands and knees scrubbing the rest of the blood that was left over from killing her mother the night before. I had to think fast, so I told Brianna that I had dropped a bottle of ketchup and there might still be glass around on the floor. I took her back up to her bedroom and tucked her back into bed. I told her that her mother had run away with another man because she didn’t want to be with us anymore. Then I finished cleaning up the mess with bleach.
I couldn’t go off to work as early that morning as I would have liked to, because I had to take Brianna to the day care. Lily had always been the one to do that, but I had been up all night making sure Lily was well buried under the basement floor of the new house I was working on. They were pouring the concrete first thing this morning, and I really would have liked to be there to make sure they didn’t discover Lilly’s body, but looking after Brianna came first. As I drove up to the jobsite after dropping Brianna off I looked around to see if there were any cop cars waiting for me, but fortunately there weren’t and the second concrete truck had just finished dumping its load. The concrete guys had spread the wet cement over most of the basement floor, and with luck Lily’s body would now be there for eternity.
The next few days were pretty hard on me. Lily and I had been having one of our normal arguments when she seemed to lose it. I hadn’t intended to kill Lily, but when she came at me with that knife I guess instinct kicked in and I twisted the knife from her hand. But I was unbalanced and fell to the floor and I dragged Lily down on top of me – and the knife. When I rolled her off me I could see that the knife was buried in her chest. I probably should have called the cops and pleaded self defense, but I already had a domestic violence conviction on my record. That one wasn’t my fault either, but the cops believed Lilly’s story over mine so I had little hope that they would ever believe that she had attacked me. And I knew if I called the cops Brianna would end up in the custody of child protective services, which I certainly didn’t want.
It took me almost 2 weeks before we could pack up and move on. I was petrified every day that the cops would come knocking on our door, and by now I knew that no one would believe my story. But finally I managed to leave town with Brianna.
Fortunately I had called Lily’s job and had told them that she was sick so they didn’t miss her. Her parents were upset with Lily for getting pregnant and marrying me, so they didn’t call often and Brianna and I snuck out of town without leaving any forwarding address.
I don’t know why I did it, but I think at first I wanted to have Brianna wear glasses so that her eyesight would come into question if she ever told anyone I was scrubbing the floor to get rid of some red splashes. I found a pair of young girl’s glasses in a thrift store, and I made Brianna wear them. I told her babysitter that Brianna needed to wear her glasses all the time and it worked. Before long Brianna really needed her glasses and could not see very well without them. Then I took her for an eye exam. Her real prescription was only -2D, but I changed her prescription slip to -4D and got her new glasses. Then for the next 3 years I increased the prescription to where it matched her age each year. I don’t know why I kept increasing her prescription, because doing that certainly wasn’t something a loving father would do, but she looked so darling wearing glasses I just couldn’t help myself from buying her new ones every year.
Wearing glasses must have done something to Brianna’s eyes. By the time she was 8 her real prescription had overtaken the phony prescription and she was now really -8.50D. And for the next few years her prescription kept climbing steadily without any help from me. By the time Brianna was 13 her real prescription was -14D and I had purchased a lot of swim and sports goggles for her before her eye doctor told us that she should stop playing sports before she had a retinal detachment. At his suggestion Brianna started to wear contact lenses, and I found it cheaper to buy them online. At the time the online store we used didn’t require a prescription, and again I really don’t know why I did it, but I started increasing her contact lens power by -0.50D every 4 months. I thought about this many times afterwards, and I think I was just trying to bind Brianna to me even more by making her completely dependant on me.
By the time Brianna was 17 her newest contacts were the same power as her age. I didn’t think there was any problem with Brianna wearing contacts until she was scouted by a modeling agency. But then it became imperative to nip this in the bud. I couldn’t have Brianna becoming a famous model. If her grandparents ever found her through her modeling it would lead them right to me, and then the disappearance of their daughter would be looked into. I did some reading online and I discovered that if a person had prism in their glasses they could no longer wear contacts, so I went to an optician that didn’t have the best reputation and told him that my daughter was having a lot of trouble with double vision, but she wouldn’t admit it. In the end Brianna ended up with 2 degrees of prism correction in her glasses, and she had to go back to wearing glasses. This fortunately killed her chance of becoming a model.
Brianna was very curious as to why she had such bad eyes and I told her that she inherited them from her mother. Her mother did wear her glasses most of the time, but she only had a prescription of -2.50D, and I actually saved the last pair of her mom’s glasses which I have tucked away in one of my drawers along with all of Brianna’s old glasses. I hadn’t cared if Lily wore glasses or not at that time, as I liked seeing her with or without glasses.
It has been hard looking after Brianna by myself for all these years. She is extremely pretty, even when she is wearing her thick glasses, so I have had to pack up and move anytime it looked like she was getting too seriously involved with a boy. Of course, I didn’t want to stay in one place for long anyway, but this was an extra incentive to hit the road. A couple of times I tried to scare the guys off by telling them that Brianna should not have children because of her poor eyesight. This sort of worked, but Brianna was very upset with me after I did that.
I had hoped that Brianna would stop having increases in her prescription after she was 18 and she stopped growing. But this has not been the case. We went out the other night to celebrate her 23rd birthday, and she is now wearing -26.00D lenses in her newest glasses. I probably could have bought her lenses that were a higher index, but it seems like such a waste of money if they are only going to last her for a year or less.
I have felt that I need to move on from here for a while now, but Brianna seems to have really settled down. She has a job in a doctor’s office and I know she really loves her job. But we have never stayed in one place for more than a single school year since I accidentally killed her mother. I really should go to the cops and confess to what I did, but I love my daughter so much that it kills me to think that she would be so upset with me that she might never talk to me again. Or what would be worse I suppose would be if she still loved me, but had to visit me in prison. I am going to have to move on though, and it is almost killing me to think that I will finally have to leave Brianna behind.
I love my daughter so much.
Specs4ever March 2013